The Playbook For The Modern Man

5 Do’s And Dont’s Of Being An Awesome Best Man

It’s your best mate’s big day. Much to your annoyance, he and his wife-to-be have spent endless Saturday evenings planning table arrangements to the detriment of boys’ night, but you’re excited for him all the same.

And as proud as you might be about holding one of the most privileged titles at a wedding, it’s safe to say you’re also riddled by those pesky nerves.

For the first-time-best-man, working out what is expected of you can be quite a thorny labyrinth to navigate. Because what exactly does a best man do? Are you doing enough? How do you even know if you’re doing it right?

Here is the executive list of five things you’re expected to do (and not to do) as the best man.

Your Job Starts Before The Actual Wedding Day


Remember the age old saying ‘Happy wife, happy best mate’s life’? The sooner you help the groom with suits, shoes, belts and cufflinks, the happier and more relaxed your mate’s bride will be.

Get in early and help out with the little things that people often forget before their wedding day, like reminding your mate he’s supposed to buy his wife a gift to open on the wedding day (you might need to do some Google research for these tips).

Because it’s the little things that separate a good best man from the world’s greatest best man.

Don’t Try To Be Something You’re Not


If you’re usually a funny guy, now is not the time to go all heartfelt and gooey (that’s the job of the bride’s dad).

This is one of the only times in your whole life, if not the only time in your life that you will have to wrap up all of your stories and thoughts about your best mate in one speech, so you want it to leave a lasting impression.

If anyone tells you to speak from the heart (i.e. make it up as you go along), don’t listen to them.

Put time and effort into your speech so that you’re prepared, confident, and one hundred percent comfortable with what you’re about to say (if you’re having seconds thoughts on that story from a Bali trip then I suggest leaving it out).  The number one rule of a wedding speech is: It’s a wedding, not a 21st.  And as funny as it might seem to mention exes, now is not the time (remember, “Happy wife…”).

Be There When Disaster Strikes


Unlike old times, today’s bride and groom usually set out to have fun at their own wedding, and their enjoyment is just as important as the guests.

So when disaster strikes, guess who’s on call (aside from that overbearing control-freak Maid of Honour?), you are! 

There’s no such thing as a seamless wedding and I can guarantee that small, and sometimes large, challenges will rear their ugly head throughout the day. It’s your job to handle them calmly. And the more prepared you are for this, the better. 

Be Suspicious Of The Ring Bearer


Tiny men in bow ties are pretty cute, but should they be trusted with 3 months worth of your best mate’s paycheque in their tiny pockets? 

Little nephew Jonathon might say he knows what he’s doing, but a good best man watches his every move.

Don’t Forget To Boogie With All Of The Mums


If anyone is going to start the party, it’s the best man. When it’s time to cheers, raise your glass first. When it’s time to dance, you hit that D-floor before anyone else can.

And most importantly, weddings are a family affair. So make sure the mum’s are happy and everything will run accordingly.


Memorise Important Names


Wedding photos can be one of the most stressful occasions of the day.

Your job here is to make everything run smoothly, and that means rounding up every intoxicated and merry wedding guest (champagne in hand), required for photos swiftly. 

Helping to ensure they’ve captured all of the right memories on their special day is something they will be forever grateful for.

Organise Food And Drink For The Location Shoot


The girls were probably so busy and nervous getting ready for the ceremony that they didn’t get a chance to eat, and no-one likes a hangry Bridesmaid.

When it comes time for the location shoot, you’ll be the man of the hour if you’ve brought along easy to hold finger food for the bridal party to inhale during the photo shoot. Extra bonus points for bringing along champagne and nice glasses, because nothing looks worse in photos than big green beer bottles!



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