Pop quiz hotshot: You’re a modern day man caught up in the daily grind, littered with hazards and naysayers on your path to glory. What do you do?
Firstly, stop watching re-runs of SPEED. Secondly, you make a bee line to the winners’ circle and arm yourself with some sage advice in the secret art of winning.
If you’re a stylish man on the move with little time for life’s quibbles, these are your twelve greatest life hacks to get the job done with flying colours.
#1 How To Google Like A Winner
Prefixes are a beautiful thing and so is the Google dialect. Know when and where to use things like ‘site:’, ‘~’, ‘..’ within your searches to fast track your results and avoid the search engine spitting at you weird stuff like sexy single grannies in your local area.
#2 What To Do With A Shaving Cut
Every man can do with this one. Simply dry the area and dab on some Vaseline to form a water tight seal and the bleeding will stop. Boxers and MMA fighters use this in the ring all the time so it’s guaranteed to be more badass than a Snoopy band-aid. Just go easy on the Vaseline as you don’t want to look like a wax figure of Michael Jackson.
#3 Hang Suits & Dress Shirts On Cedar Wood Hangers
Your best threads deserve the best form of care and that means not having them destroyed by moths, moisture and condensation. Cedar wood hangers act as a repellant for these unwanted things and because they’re thicker, they are also less prone to damaging and stretching out your clothes.
#4 Double Tap The Space Bar On Your iPhone
We get it – you’re one well sought after mofo. In the midst of firing off endless messages to your buddies in a heated battle of Jennifer Love Hewitt vs. Sarah Michelle Gellar, you may face the dire conundrum of having to navigate to that page with the full stop. Well no more. Simply double tap the space bar and one will magically appear. It also adds a space and capitalises the next letter automatically. Say what.
#5 How To Break Down A Door
You’ll never know when this one will one day come in handy so don’t write it off. If you’re caught in a pitless ball of fire and need a quick exit plan, this is your ultimate survival guide. Alternatively, use this hack if you suspect your partner’s been cheating on you.
#6 Walnuts Can Get Rid Of Wood Scuffs
Walnuts are not just for squirrels. If you ever find your finest wooden pieces to be scuffed, fight that squirrel for the walnut. Once you’ve owned the little bastard, rub your fingers along the scratch for a short moment then proceed to rub the walnut into it. Your fingers will naturally warm up the nut’s oil before it gets soaked into the wood. Buff it out with a cloth for a pristine finish.
#7 Fold Your Garments As Opposed To Hanging Them
This one’s a golden rule of men’s wardrobe maintenance. Even your lightest sweaters are prone to stretching if they sit on hangers for too long. The trick to not turning your entire wardrobe into a long-line ensemble is to only hang suits, dress shirts and other lightweight garments. Basic T-shirts are okay given they see high rotation and don’t sit there for months at a time.
#8 Pour Salt Onto Any Fresh Stain To Remove It
Even the cleanliest gent will be faced with this unwanted situation one day. Whether your date spills red wine on you or your blender decides to throw a seizure, simply run for your nearest salt shaker. Scatter those bad boys on your garments, fabric or carpet whilst working the salt in with your hands Patrick Swayze pottery-style. Leave the salt to soak for a few hours before vacuuming the coloured crystals out and voila!
#9 Chew Gum When Cutting Onions To Avoid Tears
Not that there’s anything wrong with a crying man, but if you ever do find yourself in a losing battle against the forces of nature in front of a crowd, simply chew some gum whilst cutting. You’ll be a real man in no time.
#10 Ironing Without An Iron
Woken up to a Monday morning with no iron and many wrinkled shirts? Learn to iron like a real man who doesn’t own one. Simply pop it into the dryer for a few minutes with 3-4 ice cubes and voila – you have naturally crease-free shirts.
#11 Saving Your Water-Damaged Smartphone
This one is a classic that every man should know even if they’ve never had the pleasure of their smartphone meeting the sink or worse, a toilet bowl. Turn the phone off immediately to avoid any short circuiting. Sometimes the device will do this automatically.
Do not turn it back on straight away as this will cause a short circuit and fry your device beyond saving. Instead, drop it in a bag of rice for 24-48 hours before removing it and switching it on as normal. The rice grains should draw out all the moisture in a timely and efficient manner. The toilet smell is another issue.
#12 If You Forget Which Side Your Car’s Fuel Cap Is On…
Look at your dash gauges. If the fuel gauge is on the left, your fuel cap is on the left. If it’s on the right, your fuel cap is on the right. Boom.