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Shut Up & Take My Money – Issue #73

Full screen
1 of 6|Champagne Gun
2 of 6|Analogue NT 24k Gold Edition
3 of 6|Mansory Black Marlin Jet Ski
4 of 6|Chainsaw Drone
5 of 6|Porsche 911 Office Chair
6 of 6|Michael Jordan Dream Team Sneakers

When it comes to cool gadgets and objects of affection, we like to get a bit fancy every now and then. In this week’s edition of men’s greatest objects of affection, we have a gold plated champagne gun, a gold plated Nintendo console, Jordan’s actual Olympic sneakers and a flying chainsaw. You read right. It’s money grabbing time.

#1 Champagne Gun

When pouring bubbly like a distinguished gent doesn’t cut it at a party it’s time to shoot the good stuff at patrons. The Champagne Gun was designed to do exactly that with a dose of extravagance. The contraption works by loading a magnum sized bottle into its chamber. All it takes is a good shaking and then it’s point and shoot from there. The gun can fire Champagne for up to six metres over 45 seconds. If you don’t like wasting your Champers, just use it as a holder and have them hung up around the home like the badass alcoholic you’ve always wanted to be. The gun also comes in chrome or rose gold.

Price: $460/BUY

#2 Analogue NT 24k Gold Edition

Anniversaries are such great milestones. Especially of the non-relationship variety such as the 30th anniversary of The Legend of Zelda video game. As a tribute to this classic childhood icon, Nt have created the Analogue NT 24k Gold Edition, a luxurious example of what happens when you merge 24K gold plating with an old school console. Every console case is cast from aluminium before gold plating is applied and hand polished in Seattle. The system itself will allow gamers to play NES, Famicom and Famicon Disk System games. The package also includes original Nintendo controllers, HDMI upgrade and an original The Legend of Zelda NES game cartridge finished in gold.

Price: $5,000/BUY

#3 Mansory Black Marlin Jet Ski

The Mansory name is renowned for tuning some of the world’s most exotic luxury European cars into road going beasts. When they take aim at a jet ski, it’s pretty certain that the result will be something out of this world. Based on the Sea-Doo RXT-X 260 RS, the Mansory Black Marlin Jet Ski is a carbon fibre super bike on water. The Rotax engine punches out 550hp whilst the exotic carbon body affords it a weight loss of 10kg. Why you’ll need a jet ski that fast is beside the point. It looks awesome and goes hard. All you’ll need is a Mansory G63 to tow it home in.

Price: $62,000/BUY

#4 Chainsaw Drone

Camera drones are so 2015. In the modern age it’s all about what kind of assault weapon you can hook up to a flying drone that makes the news. Falling short of attaching a gun (which has already been done), Finnish Youtubers NoodleTail attached a chainsaw to a drone and sent it on its merry way to cut trees and icicles. A separate remote controls the chainsaw and the drone. Scary, right? No matter. Balloons seem to be its Krytonite. Watch the video until the end.

Price: $TBA/BUY

#5 Porsche 911 Office Chair

For those who can’t afford the real Porsche 911, it’s time to re-evaluate the plans. Get a higher paying job? Forget it. Get an office chair which uses the actual seat from a 911 RS instead. Porsche have basically taken it out of the 911 Carrera GTS and GT3 before attaching some rollers to it. It’s no gimmick either with continuous seat height adjustment, electrical backrest adjuster, adjustable armrests and the all-important Porsche emblem embossed on the head cushion. The seat is made of a combination of leather and Alcantara. Office chair races have never sounded so appealing.

Price: $6,570/BUY

#6 Michael Jordan Dream Team Sneakers

To own a piece of history is every man’s dream. To own a piece of sneaker history as worn by the man himself is near impossible. And yet, here we are. Presenting Michael Jordan‘s original Olympic Air Jordan VII which he wore at the 1992 Barcelona Olympic Games as part of the American Dream Team. The wear and tear is there to prove it and they get even more exclusive as this pair was made specifically for the man who made countless shots at the games in these shoes. The shoes were acquired by an anonymous member of the Dream Team and have now found their way to the auction lot. Take the shot, son.

Price: $25,000+/BUY

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