Recently we asked the D’Marge community what the must-have fashion accessories for men. The responses we received ranged from the basic to the bizarre. What we found most interesting was that most responses didn’t involve material goods, but instead mentioned behaviours that a man can only perfect, not purchase.
A Smart Watch
There’s a lot to be said about a man with a nice watch. It shows he appreciates the finer things in life and that he does not rely on his iPhone to tell the time. A quality watch should be high on every man’s list. It doesn’t need to be expensive, it needs to be classic and preferably not a Thailand special which you purchased after a visit to soapies. You finissss?
Even if you have pearly whites like Steve Buscemi there’s still much value in being able to smile. Nothing says you take yourself too seriously like the guy at the bar who’s too busy being cool rather than having a good time, who attracts e-taggers (B&Ts) and voids the accessory below. Smiles cost nothing and last a lifetime, so use them often.
A Beautiful Woman (Or Man) On One’s Arm
We all know beauty comes in many forms, but there’s a lot to be said for a man with a beautiful or smart or funny woman on his arm. If you get all three, then put a god damn ring on it. A quality partner tells the world that you’re a discerning chap who doesn’t have The Clap, she’ll bring out the best in you too. Pick a bad one and they’ll think you drink the bath water.
A Real Classy Pen
No, not a biro, rather choose something that’s been handed down or recently purchased from the Caran D’Ache store. A gentleman’s special pen (no not that one) should be only used in times of triumph like signing the papers after selling your business or perhaps after putting that final nail in the divorce coffin. Choose wisely because it will be noticed.
All to often forgotten in the game of being a Cad & Bounder. We’re not quite talking using your coat to cover puddles, but remember your P’s and Q’s, refrain from eating like a Neanderthal and when the time comes do NOT ask ‘if they are real’. Manners are always noticed and noted, giving a man an air of success and maturity.
An Inoffensive But Memorable Cologne
We all have smells. Some good. Some bad. When it comes to cologne, I prefer to wear one that’s unique, sensual and memorable. It’s time to ditch the teenager deodorant and invest in a scent that will assume the role of chief panty remover and all round deal maker. Take yourself down to David Jones and spend some time smelling the likes of Comme Des Garçons, Six Scents, Dior and YSL.
Knowledge & Book Smarts
They say knowledge is power and power makes the dishwasher and other cool things around the house work. Nothing will stop a man in life like a limited knowledge of what’s going on in the world around him. No need to be a scholar but at least know something other than the process of how Fosters is brewed and you’ll be well on your way. Pick up a book, go to an art gallery and take in some culture.
Nice Shoes, Asshole
A timeless and true mark of a man is his shoes. Nothing kills a date with a beautiful women quicker than a dirty pair of Cons and some Explorer Socks. Invest in leather, the Italian type that will outlast the many women you’re trying to impress. If you can afford it we recommend owning more than one pair and alternating so they don’t get worn out. Some inspiration can be found here.
A Helping Of Confidence
Nothing says you’re a man who people want to do business or get busy with like a man with his head held high, chest out and walking tall. Confidence has allowed some of history’s biggest failures to get to the top and stay there for oh let’s say…8 years (a fool me can’t get fooled again). Find something you’re good at, do it well and be proud that you do it so well. The feeling will extend to other areas of your life and soon you’ll be John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever.
A Sense Of Humour
Like the aforementioned smile, having an unflappable sense of humour should be a part of every man’s repertoire. It’s one thing to be the prim and proper man in the right context but for all other purposes there’s no need to be a Ned Flanders type. Make others laugh and when possible make yourself laugh. Not only does it draw you positive attention from peers and potential lovers, it’ll also help you be content with life’s cruel ways. Warning: There’s a fine line between light humour and douchebag. Getting your best mate’s sister pregnant is no laughing matter.
The last and most important of all accessories are your friends. They say you can never soar like an eagle if you’re surrounded by turkeys, and this rule I’ve stuck to all my life. That’s why I have a fantastic group of underachieving sociopaths as my closest acquaintances. Whether you like it not, you’ll always be judged by the company you keep. Choose wisely and don’t be afraid to let the occasional one go if you’re no longer aligned with total world domination.