It’s a fact of life that we can’t always take a good photo. Whether it’s the lighting, the way your hair falls or just a not-so-flattering expression, it’s never going to be perfect.
Still, we know you’re better than that so we’ve put a mental checklist together so you can avoid embarrassing Facebook tags and ensure you’re presented to the rest of the world as the magnificent bastard you are.
Here are the crucial do’s and don’ts before someone snaps your mug…
You’ve gone to the trouble of spending money on a nice suit and tie, only to have it show up creased and dishevelled in your photos. Two things: good posture and a great dry cleaner. Make sure your ensemble starts off perfectly pressed (and clean) and when the flash bulbs start going off, fix up, look sharp and keep your back straight. No one likes a sloucher anyway.
Avoid Raver’s Corner (Disco Froth)
Yep. We’re referring to the excess spit and crud that can build up in the corners of your mouth. Not only is it pretty gross, it also looks creepy in photos. If it means finding a quiet corner and using your pocket square as a napkin, so be it. Just don’t let it happen.
Tuck Your Tie Under Your Collar & Tuck Your Collar Into Your Jacket
We know if you’re lazy or in a rush, your jacket and tie can become an afterthought, or even an optional accessory. But we are of the mindset, ‘if you’re going to do it. Do it right’. That means completing the whole tie tying process, tucking your collar into your jacket and finishing it off by securing the knot neatly under your collar. Leaving it even a little loose will make you look like a 70’s sleaze.
Try Not To Speak (Or Eat)
There’s no need to be mute, but when the photographer starts hassling you for a snap, it’s a signal to swallow that mouthful of food and keep the jabbering to a minimum. Yes, candid photos can often accentuate your best assets, but when you’re mocking your mates you probably aren’t looking your finest.
Avoid Awkward Neck
Keep it simple, stupid. There’s no need to look up, or down, or to the side. Just keep your head up and back straight. Angling your head downwards will give you a shiny flashbulb forehead or double chin, and arching up will just make you look like a twat.
Check Your Teeth
Teeth can make or break a photograph. Maybe you’ve been working your way through a couple of glasses of red, or you’ve taken a liking to the parsley canapes. Either way, there’s a big chance your pearly whites aren’t looking their best. Get one of your mates to check your chompers for stains or food remnants before the photos begin.
Try Not To Blink
Of course, there’s no clear cut way to avoid this, but if you feel the need to blink coming on, get it out of your system before the cameras start snapping. Another tip is to completely close your eyes until everyone says ‘cheese’, but you could risk looking a bit strange. There’s nothing worse than a great group shot, with one Blinky Bill.
Fix Your Hair
No one’s hair is looking perfect at the end of the night, particularly if you’ve been carving up the dance floor. But before pictures are taken ensure your hair is slicked down, pushed back or just away from your face. The secret to this is all in your pre-event prep. Don’t go overboard with product, but just enough so that running your hand through your hair later in the evening will push it back into place.
Pick Your Smile
Winners are grinners. If you look best with a toothy grin, think of something that makes you laugh for the most natural result. If you’re more of a smirker, remember the degree in which you smiled in a flattering photo and mimic it.
Get That Drink Out Of Your Hand
Some clever person once said to never have your photos taken with a drinking glass in hand. We agree, it’s not a good look and can often make you look more awkward than awesome. The drink just hangs around like an additional appendage. This rule includes beer, wine and champagne. One drink which is acceptable is a Pina Colada, but only if you’re on a windsurfer.