The Playbook For The Modern Man

Ridiculous Rants Prove Business Class Passengers Are The Worst People In A Crisis

As airlines step up hygiene measures, business class passengers complain about the lack of hot towels and ‘DIY turndown service’.

Complaining about business class looks bad at the best of times. Complaining about business class, then, in the midst of a pandemic, is akin to closing yourself off from the world, putting masking tape over your ears, and repeatedly playing “We Are The Champions” at top volume, exchanging “We” for “I”.

Or something like that.

In all seriousness, today we reached a level of absurdity that would make Camus spit out his Macadamia nuts with rage. That would make Sisyphus give up and go home. That would make even the most optimistic and forgiving among us abandon the pretence that, deep down, people are kind and sensitive and wonderful.

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The truth is, some suck.

Case in point: as over 180,00 people (at the time of writing) battle a potentially lethal virus, some pointy end passengers are whinging about their hot towel service being removed.

Never mind this is yet another way the virus might spread. Never mind hot towels are neither anti-bacterial nor anti-viral. Never mind Britsh Airways banned hot towels specifically to prevent the spread of the virus. ‘H’ wants his (radial) rub and tug.

Further complaints have come about due to downgrades…

… price swings…

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… and cancellations.

Oh, and there was also a business class review, before the Coronavirus had spread quite so far (the 17th of February, to be precise) which critiqued Air India’s silk pillows (“The silk-covered pillow was decently sized, although not very supportive or comfortable”) and “DIY turndown service.”

All this, despite Air India’s business class being one of the cheaper pointy end offerings in the sky, as well as renowned for being sub-par. In any case, the review was posted to Twitter by someone else who also disliked Air India business class, more recently (on the 5th of March).

While it’s tempting to write off all these complaints as the product of a society gone wrong, it’s actually – maybe – not our fault. After all: we’re hardly immune from having a business class gripe here at DMARGE. No, we reckon technology (and the growing expectation that if you tag a company in Twitter they have to give you what you want), to blame, for the rise of tone-deaf complaints.

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  • George L

    While the hot towel complaint is ludicrous, it’s hardly indicative of all business class fliers. In fact, it’s so extreme and rare that it inspired a bored blogger to write a hit piece.

    The other complaints are extremely valid. If you don’t like travel, stay off the topic. This is the first and clearly last time I’ll be visiting this website, for sure.

  • chadm252

    I would opine that not all of these are “complaints”. But that said, the suggestion that an airline changed equipment because of “my Asian last name” is truly beyond contempt.

  • D L Miller

    In terms of merit, it’s a shaky claim, but not necessarily beyond contempt. If it was a last minute change by a gate agent, they’ve been known to employ questionable logic. The more puzzling issue is being bumped from paid First to Main, seemingly without compensation, only to discover two white men in her original seats. She had two? Had she been downgraded, she would have been refunded with a voucher at least. Her entire argument is inconsistent.

  • chadm252

    I am quite certain there’s not a gate agent on the planet with the authority to change the aircraft operated on a given flight. But I apologize, I misread the original tweet. Seems the complaint was about the seat reassignment with the apparent lie that it was due to equipment change, in which case, I rescind everything I said. Haha.

  • D L Miller

    I would wager that you are correct. If such a powerful gate agent exists, I would like to meet them. I’m quite certain that our maligned passenger has no idea that even identical aircraft aren’t necessarily identical, nor how changes are made. She was inconvenienced. Ah well.

  • Josh

    This article is trash.

  • Quinn

    The air India article you didn’t link because people would be able to see the person you’re slandering was highly ironic. They understood what they were in for, yet were still obliged to do a standard travel blog review, or as they call it “their job.”

    Please get over yourself. Even mentioning that in the context of this article borders on non sequitur.

  • wow

    Lmao get new writers… Stop spewing out senseless garbage.

  • Josh

    The hot towel complaint isn’t even ludicrous. It’s just a person making a mistake. Wow, they are such a bad person for thinking a hot towel might help their sanitation, and not realizing it wouldn’t. And then, they had the audacity to make an offhand remark about it. The horror!

    Then another customer expected to actually get a business class seat after, get this, paying full fare for a business class seat (probably thousands and thousands of dollars). What a jerk! I mean what kind of asshole expects to get the product they paid for?

    And of course, by pointing out that a product doesn’t raise to industry standards, well that just proves someone is “bad in a crisis” now doesn’t it?

    Perhaps the truth is this article is click bait nonsense, or written by a child who loves to engage in class warfare because they themselves have no empathy and are a bad person.

  • George L

    I think anyone, traveling in any class, taking to the internet about a lack of a warmed towel is ludicrous, but I certainly agree with the rest you’ve said. A child indeed. That said, the whole premise and attitude of DMARGE is “douchebaggery for douchebags”, isn’t it?

  • Josh

    Fair point, but I think they were talking more about the denial of people to engage in hygiene during a crisis like this. Just because they were wrong doesn’t make them a bad person.

  • James

    Fair enough. Still a bit tone deaf to complain about downgrades, hundred dollar price difference etc. when others are paying thousands just to get home before the borders shut though, no?

  • James
  • James

    Pretty sure we linked it?

  • Josh

    Why is it relevant what other people are doing? If one person has a customer service issue, it has nothing to do with “others paying thousands just to get home.” A person should still get the ticket they paid for on an entirely unrelated flight, no matter what’s going on and they have every right to contact customer service about it.

    They weren’t “ranting.” The clips you showed were people saying legitimate things, many times in entirely respectful ways.

    Your beef seems to be just the concept that one person could pay for a different class of service, and expect to get it. Yeah, that’s why the tickets in business class are generally 2 to 5 times more than coach. If you paid 2 to 5 times more for something specifically to get special treatment, and then didn’t receive it, would you NOT take it up with customer service?

    Don’t be ridiculous. These customer’s issues have literally nothing to do with anyone else, and they are entitled to them.

    You mock people trying to get home, trying to get a refund, people concerned with hygiene, people who were downgraded incorrectly even though they paid for a ticket…where exactly is any evidence of “business class passengers being bad during a crisis?”

  • George L

    I disagree. Each situation should be looked at on their own merit. If you paid $2000 to get home from Europe, what does it have to do with me paying $2000 flying First class from Atlanta to New York? The fact is, when you make a contract for a good and one party breaches that contract, delivering an inferior good that wasn’t agreed upon, it is a breach of contract. Right? Basic contract law. The airlines have been subverting that for decades with impunity. How does complaining about it make the airline the victim? You no doubt blame women for getting raped.

  • James

    I’ll simplify: “complaining about trivial shit”

  • Josh

    Clearly you don’t have much experience traveling.

  • kprana

    Completely agree. If you pay a premium over a standard product/service, it’s only natural that you set your expectations accordingly. Very seldom, if any, someone splurges on a business class seat just to get a better seat. The price difference doesn’t justify that.

    Quite a few premium passengers, myself included, also pay out of their own pocket (in cash or miles) so that hurts a bit more.

    I was once rather upset (although didn’t log a formal complaint) when I was the only passenger in Business Class and no one bothered to engage with me or used my name, or took their time to explain the menu. The only time they made a small talk was when they wrongly assumed my nationality, which wasn’t that big a deal for me but nonetheless annoying. They couldn’t even manage to keep the toilet clean (and it was shared only between me and the crews). SMH.

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