As we grasp the full seriousness of Coronavirus, government jackboots have come down the world over. Depending on where you live this could mean anything from a total lockdown (Spain, Italy, etc.) to not being able to get a 31-minute haircut (Australia).
We are all, however, developing nervous ticks, due to the mental pressure that comes with being forced to work from home with your unruly family or unemployed spouse (or, for those that live alone, your bland and empty apartment).
Not sure what we mean? Let’s put it this way: you probably weren’t holding your breath when someone passed close by you in a supermarket aisle a couple of months back. With us? Cool. Now, while you might not do all of these, if you don’t do any we’ll find that hard to believe.
These are the weird habits we’re collectively developing due to Coronavirus, courtesy of the good people of Twitter.
Holding your breath every time someone walks by
— nicole (@_luxuree) March 25, 2020
Either that or timing your breathing to exhale rather than inhale as they walk past. Or, you know, just giving people a wide berth – for both your sakes.
Treating quarantine like an airport
Drinking a beer at 10 AM because time does not exist during quarantine
— Brandon (@Bwhitt94) March 21, 2020
Trackpants? Check. Drinking at 10 in the morning? No judgement.
Working out at strange hours
Before we moved, my wife would ask me every year (15), “Why do we have a barbell (elieko) under the bed?” It’s now paying off due to #SocialDistancing. Complexes for the soul. Working on expanding the #homegym pic.twitter.com/M2xz5Iob6P
— David Bass (@CoachDBass) March 25, 2020
That or thanking your lucky stars for your zombie apocalypse survival kit. Oh, and people tend to go one of two ways during self-isolation. You either treat it like a stint in prison and come out ripped, or you can’t motivate yourself to work out for longer than two minutes and make a long-awaited transition into a slug.
Going to the virtual pub
I am proud. Did my first post-work social distancing happy hour. pic.twitter.com/o3iFoZbT77
— Laurel Nava (@CITENava) March 26, 2020
Picking up hobbies that have no tangible use
— Mike Whalen (@mike_mbwhalen51) March 26, 2020
When was the last time you made a paper plane?
well I have two virtual orgies to attend tonight
— Sophie Saint Thomas (@TheBowieCat) March 21, 2020
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Falling in and out of love with classical music
Quarantine Day 6: Listening to classical music was calming in previous days but now when I hear it, I look at my cat and he looks like he’s mid-murder premeditation so that’s enough of that.
— smugdingus (@smugdingus) March 18, 2020