Tom Brady’s 11-day absence from the Buccaneers’ training camp has been described by former coach Bruce Arians as “a really good move for everybody.” But was it really, and why exactly was Brady absent? Fan theories are currently running wild. Here is a selection of the most intriguing theories.
When the legendary 45-year-old quarterback Tom Brady got back from a reported holiday in the Bahamas last week, he went straight back into the Buccaneers’ training camp, without offering much explanation to the media as to why he missed 11 days of the camp. He then got straight into action, on Saturday playing a one series against the Indianapolis Colts (in which he led the Bucaneers on an 11-play, 66-yard field goal drive).
Regarding his absence from training, he said simply: “I’ve played a lot of football in my day — a lot of practices, a lot of games, and a lot of seasons…I’m ready to go.”
“It’s all personal,” Brady said. “You know everyone’s got different situations they’re dealing with. So, we all have really unique challenges to our life. I’m 45 years old, man. There’s a lot of sh*t going on. You’ve just got to try to figure out life the best you can. It’s a continuous process.”
Brady also commented on transfer rumours, putting them to bed, more or less. He said: “I read all these different stories about all these different places I was supposed to go or could have gone. I was only going to go to one place, which was here. I think this whole organization knows that.”
Due to the dearth of official information about Brady’s absence, fans have been going a bit wild with theories of their own. On the ESPN NFL Instagram page, for instance, fans have run rampant. One popular (and very much unconfirmed) theory is that Brady took time off to get some “work done.”
“Botox for one,” one Instagram user commented. Various others chimed in with similar remarks like: “face lift, plastic surgery,” “He get lip work done?” and “his mouth, all that surgery.” Others thought Brady looked slimmer, commenting: “Why my man look so lean?”
Of course, it’s extraordinarily unlikely Brady would have gone away to get liposuction, but this is the bowels of the internet we are talking about… Speaking of which, another Instagram user said he might have gone away to get a colonoscopy. The next suggestion was a mid-life crisis or marital issues. Though this, too, is unconfirmed as all heck, it would, in this writer’s opinion, make more sense than the previous theories.
“Gisele ain’t playin,” one Instagram user wrote, with other comments coming in along a similar tune. “Bro is going through it,” one wrote. Another speculated: “Divorce incomin.” Other fans took it less seriously, ensuring others that they were just making sure the incredible athlete was still in tip top shape: “They had to make sure the clone wasn’t malfunctioning.”
“There are people in the league who’s parents are younger than Brady,” yet another said, in a testament to the quarterback’s remarkable longevity. Finally, the last wacky suggestion we saw was the theory that Brady went away to binge-watch The Masked Singer (“The Masked Singer takes up a lot of time”).
In terms of how his absence has been received, Brady continues to receive leniency from some fans, while others urged him to retire. One wrote: “So they had an off-season to prepare but you said you’re coming back so they make no moves there and now you’re leaving again.”
“Stay retired bruh,” said another. Yet another aggrieved keyboard warrior said: “Bro is to addicted to the game, he don’t know how to stop at this point.”
As for us, we’d say Brady is more than entitled to a mid-life crisis (or a cheeky extra holiday) if he’d like one (though we aren’t suggesting that’s what this was). So long as he performs on the field, we imagine he’ll win the fans back over in no time at all.