If cattle class is a dungeon of despair – a medieval torture that spikes you (sometimes literally) to retreat into yourself – business class is a prison of gold (where spreading and stretching is not only possible but encouraged).
In both cases, you’re still trapped in a glorified tin can, but at least in business you’re stuck in comfort. That’s the idea, anyway. But as we’re about to discover there’s more to it than meets the eye.
In fact, if the revelations from a recent Reddit thread are to be believed, there are a number of hardships only business class passengers know. Go figure.
Entitled “At what NW did you start to fly first/business class?” the thread asks users to comment, “where you paid for the tickets versus using points.”
Attracting 235 comments the thread also reveals some of the unlikely perils of starting to fly up the pointy end.
Attracting 295 upvotes, the top comment reads: “We started flying business class (mostly with credit card points, but sometime cash) at about $3M.”
“But be warned – once you start with the lay flat seats for long haul, it’s hard to go back. I essentially can’t fly over 6 hours or a red eye in economy anymore.”
Another user wrote, in response, “My wife, who is super frugal, had this issue. This is a woman who was happy to get married in Vegas for a few hundred bucks, buy her own wedding ring used off a divorcee for $1,000, and has no real interest in new cars.”
“But the first time I upgraded us to a lay flat on a trip back from London, she sat in the lay flat seat when it was still upright, took it all in, and said, ‘I don’t think I can go back to economy.’ Then I reclined my seat to flat and she said, ‘Wait, it’s a bed?!’ So yeah, it’s hard to go back.”
“Hah, that reminds me of my wife,” another commented, proving it’s not just luxury experiences at 40,000ft that can ruin you for life. “When we first started dating, she told me she didn’t really like steak. She wasn’t a big meat eater at all and it just so happened that she usually ordered the cheapest dishes on the menu at a restaurant.”
“Then one day I took her to a fancy steak house – the best one in town, with $80 filet mignon – and had her get a steak. She absolutely loved it. Now any time we go to a restaurant where filet is on the menu, she gets it. She went from always getting the cheapest thing on the menu to the most expensive thing. Every time.”
“This is my wife,” yet another user shared. “I used to get upgraded to business class when travelling for work so I got it, but she thought it was a waste of points/money/not necessary. Then we went on an international trip (red-eye from where we live) and I just booked business class top level on a 747. Didn’t tell her, but we got to the lounge and she’s like ‘how did we get access to this?’ and I said ‘because we’re flying business class.’ Was too late for her to complain, so she went with it. When we boarded early and were directed upstairs she was like wtf.
“Now she’s totally good with it on long flights.”
DMARGE has previously reported on the unexpected perils of the pointy end, including (but not limited to), it being hard to get ‘work’ done when you’re full-to-bursting and have quaffed one too many glasses of champagne, the seatbelt being ‘more complex’ than the economy one and ‘imposter syndrome.’
That pales in comparison, however, to the stressors of first-class, which can be seen below…